SRK

His clenching teeth
His flailing arms

His botoxed face
His beeping gaze

His defected walk
His cocky talk

Oh god, please make it stop

Hey srk when will you learn
That your flicks are just a pun

You might be a great being at heart
But on screen you act like a total fart

Godly status in every role
Rising up from any hole
A better movie is Bol Radha Bol

Of all your crap that I have borne
Don 2 pricks like a bloody thorn

The public is taken completely for granted
But the sensible ones feel totally haunted

Any of you will ruin a reel
But hey,that's what I feel!

iDISS

Ten years ago there was just a number pad with a red and green button

All people did was talk on the rectangular marvel

Then came a device sporting the i

Changed the world for the obsessive eye

There was a time of imacs

They then turned to ibooks

With the future in place

They needed more of the ‘i’

‘i’ can do a lot of things

So they podded and padded

They touched and they phoned

And now they have even stored

‘i’ tell you what to do

‘i’ tell you how to do

‘i’ even say, "If you don’t have an iphone…you don’t have an iphone!"

Like it would take eons to figure

With a splash of a dash

There is no flash

For someone you care

You cannot share

Can’t do jack without itunes

Stick with it that is your fortune

Still the ibuggers just stand by

With a tall pad in their flailing arms

They say beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder

But here the beauty lies in the i's of the share holder!

Biting of the apple has never gone so well

Newton is turning, waiting to unleash hell

A few years’ later ibabies be born

Then anything with the ‘i’ will be the best pie!

ipiss, imiss, ihiss, and sometimes i-even-diss!

SUCKER

A sucker for the perfect life

Lots of money and a woman to feel nice

Even if it’s not true

You go ahead and plan your move

Seems you're forced from within your mind

Doing everything to convince its divine

Doubt doesn’t seep in

It just awakens

That’s when you wonder, is this for real?

If patience is a bloody virtue

Soon enough it turns worthless

Try to see the light

But the tunnel takes you beyond the night

Grab what you have and just be grateful

No absolute need of being hateful

Till you confess this to the world

The feeling will crawl back on its own

Take the step, make the dive

See what happens with a fight!

HOP

When you hop around the world
Millions of people you meet

The duration has a lot to say

You make friends for eternity

But when you skip to the next destination

The world is not that simple

Newer people on the horizon

Old ones in the fray

As your circle of life gets bigger

The distance with the loved ones grows larger

In this day of the information age

You’d think things are easy to say

Stuff changes with the time
Can’t be stuck on a speed bump all the while

No matter how many people you hold
At the end of the day you'll be alone

Drifting is a part of life

Cause life is lead in phases alone
 
No need to lament the loss of one
Round the next corner, another is found!

KING KENNY

He hails from Scotland

Home of the scotch

Arrived from Celtic

To the banks of Mersey (His home forever be)

Bob saw a vision in 1977

A sound investment of 440,000!

Taking the role of shaking the Kop

Swaying Liverpool all the way to the top

As if scoring goals was not enough

Accepted the mantle of coaching the club

Absolute glory achieved on the front

Bidding goodbye after so many cups

The club turned to others to pull his work forward

Everything achieved in that space of time

Except the coveted Premier League prize

Then came the yanks with promises galore

Took everything, even the Anfield floor

Two decades passed without sheer luck

LFC staring down the barrel of a gun

In such times of terrible crises

Stars moved for trophies elsewhere

But all was not lost

The club had been bought

Entered John Henry

Spoke like a visionary

Lead the legend back to his home

Boosting the kitty with millions in store

The fans elated, the players fearless

Singing in unison, "You'll Never Walk Alone"

The other clubs shaking in their very bones

The legend spoke, the legend showed

The legend brought in some fresh imports

What followed in 6 months

The whole world did see

Off with bad memories

Wiped the slate clean

Few hours from now the season begins

We’ll overturn any situation

Hope restored back in our hearts

"Come on, you Reds, let's make the start!"

Glossary:

Kop – One of the most decorated, passionate of football stands across the world inspired by

The Battle Of Spion Kop

Celtic – Celtic Football Club

Mersey – River Mersey, Liverpool

Bob – Bob Paisely; one of the greatest managers in LFC history

John Henry – Current owner, LFC

Anfield – LFC Stadium

Red – LFC fan

THE WORLD

What's going on with the world?

Today you're sleeping, tomorrow you're not

The world witnesses a fanatic blown

Taking thousands for his illicit cause

This stirs a furore in people's minds

Thousands again, blown out of kind

The darkest day in the history of mankind

The water in the seas going round and round

The tsunami comes, the riots die

The earth quakes and screws the world

That’s the time when the bombings rest

What evil wants, nature does

There is not much place left in the world

The odds against us are all to none

Mother nature, are you really mad?

Mother nature, are we that bad?

Mother nature, why am I so sad?

Mother nature, let us create a new fad...

With all the hope we pray to you

To find something better to do

A species god-only-knows-how-old

Is begging to be... undone

HAPPY

Everything is just right
Nothing can go wrong
The price you paid was worth the wait

Your mind acting like a broiler
But you pull up the strength to conquer

Take inspiration from the environment
Arrest desperation on the horizon

The moment we call happy
No way is it at all sappy

Imprinted in the back of the mind
Cherish the memory till the end of time

Things that make you elated with joy
Share it with the right one, no need to be coy

Whining will give you no sense of relief
Happiness will give you a blissful sleep

Its up to you what you choose
In memory of a grey goose!

The Road, My Friend

A loner is a loner is a loner

Cruising down the highway

At the speed of 99

The outside a blur

The inside a blah

Its all the road that leads to what

The road to love

It's the broken one

The road to lust

It's the chosen one

The road to hate

It's begotten me

The road to life

It's a nece-ssity!

The road don’t judge like a woman scorned
The road don’t stab like a jealous foe

The road can give any reason to hate
Even pissed off drivers ask for a rebate!

Road rage is just a phase
Every passenger has a ghostly face

Things relating to another life
The throttle makes you forget those bites

Shift into 5th, let her rip
The engine roaring into bits

All the horses bursting with life

Thumping their power without a fight

Blare the music through the roof

Scare the poor dog going ‘woof’

The hair on your neck standing up

Everything else falling in the plot

The world seems right from behind the wheel

Anything is possible if you feel

All the horses and not the Kings men

Can even get Humpty together again!

HO HUM DE DUM

That guy’s got a Porsche

Ho hum de dum

A girl stood you up

Ho hum de dum

Your neighbour cracked a rib

Ho hum de dum

The pope is a git

Ho hum de dum

Ignorance is bliss

What don't touch you, don't affect you

And what does affect you, might not touch you

For the shit that definitely touches and affects you

Ho hum de dum

Your love's been a waste

Ho hum de dum

The girl is still great

Ho hum de dum

You find a new mate

Ho hum de dum

Life isn't that great

Ho hum de dum

Whatever happens may be for good

That don't help when she stirs you up

Stares at you with utmost disgust

Gazing away, far, far away

Let it go beyond the fray

You're not a bad guy

Yet many women make you the fall guy

The world is on fire

Ho hum de dum

The situation is dire

Ho hum de dum

The glaciers are melting

Ho hum de dum

The activists are pelting

Ho hum de dum

Turn the tube and all hell’s broken loose

Some schmuck, for his inane cause

Planted bombs that are set off

Sorrow and grief everywhere

Wait a few days it’ll all go away

They blow the trumpet

Ho hum de dum

Break the phone set

Ho hum de dum

Left maybe right

Ho hum de dum

Wrong is surely right

Ho hum de dum

No matter what happens normality ensues

While people on the left are still getting sued

The media's on fire reporting the truth

What remains to be seen is if it is true

You read this rhyme

Ho hum de dum

Thought it was grand

Ho hum de dum

Maybe it was bland

Ho hum de dum

Just go take a hike

Ho hum de dum!

INDEED

They say a friend in need is a friend indeed

But the friend who does the deed is not in need

I get out at 2 am

There’s a truck on the road

I see it miles away

He’s probably heading home

He must be in a hurry

Cause he cuts all my space

I swerve to the left but it’s too late

I’m thrown off the ledge

But the truck’s pulled away

At this dire-needy-hour

You call upon your friend

He comes in a haste worried about you

Ready to paste one to the guys who did this to you

This is a man who does not fight

Come the hour he's breaking his own rules

Such is a bond between two friends

Even though there's only so much one can tell

People who do not have such friends

Tend to make fun calling them names

Never will they understand the friendship deed

Till someone helps them indeed!

CHASE

The ones you chase always run away

The ones you don't cling to stay

What's with these chicks they love the game

Even though it leads to no fame

If only they knew the way of the heart

They wouldn't smite you without a shout

Why the hell are you so frustrated?

God damnit you feel so saturated

Life is not free

You've got to pay a price

Even if you're nice

Your foot's stuck in the ice

Trying to break free from the norms of the world

Acceptance playing a big fat role

There has to be a being somewhere in this hole

Who can come around and make you whole

They say half the fun is in the chase

Even though you know it's not the case

They came up with the phrase

To pacify their jilted maze

BANNED

Lift this ban up
There’s nothing to control

Tear this ban up
There’s nothing to hold

Of all the highs in the world
Alcohol seems the devils own

While things like tobacco are there so cheap
A box of booze is not for keeps

It’s not only smoking that I mean
The chewable kind is harder to free

Why oh why then do we have this ban?
To fill the holes of people who never had

Gandhi wanted it for political reason
To stop the revenue for British treason

Gave up his life for the people of this nation
Corruption is the only gift we have given

Enter the thought of a Gujarati's mind
Safety correlates to the consumption of its kind

Hence it is labelled as a bad thing
Not thinking where all of it is going

Pay a hefty sum to bootleg a bottle
Most of the money goes for illicit extortion

Generating sums of millions
Not one paisa of it is legal

The poor who cannot afford these kind
Turn to their natives, drinking blind

The local shine can be fatal
Things added to increase intoxication

Still the big-wigs just stand by
With a tall glass of an aged wine

Even though the issue is faced by thousands
All we can do is bemoan the situation

The young Gujju out of his home
Sees a booze shop and loses control

Thus starts a drinking binge
Away from home
Who’s gonna see him?
His folks are at home

I’ve lost all hope of seeing a pub
Where I can just go and have some fun

Fast forward a million years this affair will prevail
It’ll reach a point where there’s only despair

Go-A!

Surrounded by heavenly bodies

In every shape and form

None of it matters to me

Solitude is all I want

Hard to imagine a place like this

Where you see things in eternal bliss

No one around gives a damn

But you have water everywhere

There is no torment anywhere

Happiness all the way

The tide is low take a dip

The tide goes high take a sip

Sit in a shack by the beach

Order some breakfast and some tea

Laze the morning in the shade

Get on the bike and ride away

Feel no tension in your way

Get to the next beach and press repeat

I promise, you can do this for weeks

The folk around don’t bother

But some around do matter

Livelihood, the biggest enemy

You'll be fleeced for every penny

In hindsight, it will all fade

The memories will be all that remain

Oh, Goa, you're amazing

Even when the sun is blazing

Just stay the way you are

No matter how near how far

A place where you can Go-A!

Inhuman

Learn the way of the high life

Grow up to be a big shot

But you're still missing shit

From the aforementioned high life

Spit on the sidewalk, inhuman

Trash the road, inhuman

Leave the lights on, inhuman

Burn the oxygen, inhuman

The dogs are wailing, inhuman

The poor are howling, inhuman

The world is crying, inhuman

But you don’t care...

Cause you're inhuman

Follow hypocrisy, inhuman

Put up a facade, inhuman

Say what is tough, inhuman

Do what is easy, inhuman

Respect the pope, inhuman

Diss your dad, inhuman

Salute the president, inhuman

Screw the army, inhuman

Lie to your folks, inhuman

Shy on the world, inhuman

Escape the good, inhuman

Join evil, inhuman

Say A, inhuman

Do B, inhuman

Hail C, inhuman

Ignore D, inhuman

You’re a coward, inhuman

Prick yourself, inhuman

Puff away, inhuman

Down the bottle, inhuman

Drown your sorrows, inhuman

Wake the next day, inhuman

Continue the cycle, inhuman

Hump the world, inhuman

Hypocrisy rules

Faith blues

Emotional diss

Ignorance bliss

Someone oughta slap you, inhuman

Wake the hell up, inhuman

Stop this shit, inhuman

Spare the world, inhuman

Try to be human, inhuman

RUNNING

Lying, cheating, deceit...

What’s the world come to?

Or was it always like this?

The insurance scam

The loan scam

The fodder scam

The software scam

The scams are endless

And hence the shams are endless

The cocky charades and plastic smiles

Never cease to befriend the mind

The deeper the wound

The more you sink

Till you are consumed by glee

And all of you is accounted for

The green is a nasty thing

The smell of it, the feel of it

The habit of it, the want of it

Makes you forget humanity

To the depths of the unknown you fall

Becoming a hungrier beast

Such a part of us it’s become

Guilt doesn't even come up

But, there still lies hope in a few

The ones who think alike

Running the other way

The Wanderer

Sleep in the morning

Wake in the night
Thank the lord you're still alive

Wondering where you were

Confused where you are

An angel on one end

The devil on the other

Rustling between two worlds

He is The Wanderer

In the cold black night

He ventures alone

From the arms of Mary

To the depths of Hades

Feeling the torment everyday

Doing nothing to make it go away

Reunion Bites

At the tender age of 8

You're thrown in the midst of new mates

Living the life of a prince

The school you've gone to is the shit

Years go by with new faces

Growing up seeing changes

The values instilled are there to stay

The wrongs built-in will hopefully go away

Such is the phase of school life

Learn a lot through getting into fights

There are some who do not wish to grow

Trivial bullshit is all they look for

Such was the case back then

10 years later all hasn't changed

Though a decade is a long time to ponder

Going back was so overwhelming that I wonder

Time flew by the nine years I was there

Suddenly I’m back with some who care

The beauty of the school remains as it is

The fields where we weeded look as bright

Blood, sweat and tears

The good, the bad, the fears

Some have grown up to be stars

Some are still whining about bars

Some are leading a peaceful life

Some have gone the anonymous way

Issues there are plenty

Solutions there are tenfold

It’s about who takes the first step

Cause the blame goes in his stead

The rest will still look on

And compare us to the elite ones

Writing this I’ve identified

The problem facing all mayoites

Trying to keep up with the world

Education having absolutely no role

The ego then is still here to stay

Can’t do jack with it in the way!

A Jester To Them All

There are the good people

And the bad people

The smart people

And the dumb people

The pretty to the not so pretty

I'm just a jester to them all

No difference to anyone around

And there's nothing funny about this at all

Every time I leave

A bird comes to me

Flocking her hair in my face

Laughing at stuff I had said

Behind this wall of comedy

Lies a man with dignity

What gives is to be given

What takes is to be forgotten

So much at stake

Not even funny

Though I can only think of things

That are funny

A jester to myself

A jester to them all...

Innocence lost, hard to trust

Like a broken shadow on a shattered wall

Circle [2009-2011]

HALF CIRCLE [July 2009]

She’s lying there in a slumber
You're wondering if this is real
Should you go on or just let go?
Though, its a long time to go

She'll grow up, she'll mature
And by the laws of nature
So shall you

The distance now just might be good
For in the long run it may do US some good
You have to wait, you have to try
No matter what goes on in your mind

You like her, you like her a lot
If that’s love, what is not?

The clans are different
And so the plans'd be different
One debacle after the other
Is it enough to look for another?
The answer is no, hell no

FULL CIRCLE [April 2010]
On another note,
You wake from your slumber
And realise its not real
You have let go
Its been a long time ago

She never grew up, she never matured
But the laws of nature worked on you

The distance then was no good
For in the close run it didn’t do US any good
I cannot wait, nor wish to try
Cause a lot is going on in my mind

You liked her, liked her a lot
That wasn’t love, just a thrust

The clans were different
And so the plans were definitely different
All debacles later
It’s more than enough to look for another

From the time of the start
To the moment today
I have gone a full circle
With a long delay